Relationships can be quite exciting and thrilling especially at its initial phase – you both learning new things about each other, sharing new surprises and experiences like your first date, first vacation, and so on. At this stage, the relationship hinges on the foundation of discovery, pleasure, and addition which in-turn creates a strong bond with our significant other.
But what’s the relationship like after a few years?
According to thesocialman.com, “…as the relationship progresses, you continue to learn more about this person, and they learn more about you. The discoveries become fewer and farther between. The dopamine rushes dry up. You (or her) start looking elsewhere for these feelings of novelty, neglecting your relationship.”
Certainly, no two relationships are the same; however, the reason why people leave are oftentimes the same. These reasons hinge on almost all categories of relationships as touching both families, social, and even spiritual relationships.
Its no longer news, the high rate of divorces prevalent among couples these days; children are not left out also as we see a lot of children homeless, abandoned, and disowned by their biological parents. We now see employees quitting their jobs, religious members, or followers also withdrawing their commitment & allegiance and most commonly, friends deserting friends.
When people leave you for various reasons and move on with their lives, you may oftentimes be bothered and confused especially when it’s frequent. Some likely questions that may bug your mind are:
- Would they have stayed longer if things were done differently?
- Did I contribute to their leaving?
- Am I a people person or do I repel people?
- Was I busy playing the blame game?
The fact remains that, none of this incidence happens instantly. It all started out gradually like a drizzling rain that gets built up over time. Those little things you saw as “insignificant” has somehow accumulated to cause this great gorge that has led to irreconcilable differences.
There are many factors as to why relationships might not last too long but below is just a few major reasons why relationships break up.
1.) Lack of Trust
Trust is one major ingredient that binds relationships. Once it’s missing there’s bound to be hitches. When you begin to question your partner’s fidelity or sincerity, just know that the relationship is already on that verge of collapse. Build trust in your relationships especially with your spouse and clients. Don’t leave any loopholes that may warrant suspicion and distrust.
When the activities in the relationship are somewhat stereotypical and no flavours are added to spice up the relationship, one tends to become bored with repeated activities, and sooner than later, gets fed up. It’s Okay at some point in a relationship to ask yourself some questions like:
What are those things you did when you were wooing your partner or while courting?
What happened to all the initial spark?
Your partner may be leaving due to boredom; therefore be Dynamic. Eat out often with your significant other, have nice picnics together with your family, go for vacations and dates even as couples, and take quality time to spoil your partner with some expensive treats at intervals. Being unpredictable in the relationship helps to revive that spark once again.
3.) Lack of Communication
Communication is the life-wire of any good relationship as a lack of it could result in loads of problems and misunderstandings which if not worked upon, could make the relationship with your significant other much harder to deal with. Simple things we do in a relationship like acknowledging and apologizing for our shortcomings can put us on the right path to better communication with our partners.
4.) Unhealthy Habits
You must be aware by now that a toxic environment is repulsive. When the environment is choked up with toxicity, the relationship becomes uninspiring and apathetic. Unhealthy cultures can be inconducive for your optimistic significant other who is undoubtedly sure to take a bow and flee for emotional safety. Nobody appreciates a toxic relationship, so watch keenly as it could be that one partner is making the relationship unhealthy for the other through acts like constant nagging, insecurity issues, selfishness, and such likes.
Studies show that it takes three (3) positive expressions to cancel one (1) negative expression. No relationship will thrive in a negative atmosphere. Do you always capitalize on the wrongs and rarely notice or appreciate the rights? Even when correcting the wrongs, do you do so in love or you are so full of negativity and condemnation?
Are you a difficult person? It could be the major reason why people often walk away. Strive to be more positive, change your approach, and see the outcome.
6.) Lack of Appreciation
Appreciation goes a long way to boost a relationship as it puts that spark on the recipient. How appreciative are you in that relationship? How often do you acknowledge what you love about your partner? Do you appreciate your kids for the chores they help out in the house? It’s a very powerful motivator if you don’t know. Learn to appreciate your spouse, clients, and employees alike. It endears you to them.
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